Happy Friday!
About five-ish months ago, I was in my hometown visiting family. I met up with a friend who I hadn't seen since high school (looking at you Keah!) and a very close friend (looking at you Sara!) and realized how positive they were about everything. Somewhere along the line, I slipped into a deep hole of negative thinking. Let's be honest, negative thinking brings you down in every single way. It affects your home life, your mental health, your work, your health, the people around you...everything.
I have been working over the past 5 months to turn my negativity around. While, yes, I am human and I still fall into the negative thinking worm hole from time to time, I have been finding positivity to be my go-to attitude now. I literally faked it until I made it. (Side note - I never though you could actually 'fake it until you made it.' You actually can!)
I am not an expert on the subject (I'm a geographer, not a psychologist), but there were several tricks that I used to lessen the grasp that negative thinking had on me. I highly recommend trying these out if you are looking to change your attitude towards your life and situation:
1. When something negative, unhappy, or unpleasant happens to you, stop, think, and then write yourself a list of why this negative thing can be a blessing in disguise. If you are unable to do this in the moment (this is a hard switch to make), come back to it later. What good can come out of the situation? What is the silver lining? Doing this everytime anything negative happens leads, over time, to this action becoming second nature.
2. If you feel as though you've reacted poorly (or just not how you would have liked to have reacted) in a situation and are thus having negative and weighing thoughts, do your best to correct the situation and then give yourself permission to move beyond it. If you apologize or correct yourself, you have done the best you can and that is all you can do.
3. Spend 5 minutes in bed right when you wake up in the morning thinking positive mantras like:
- My day is going to be awesome.
- I am incredibly blessed.
- I am a hard-working, beautiful woman (or man!).
- No matter what others think of me, I do everything I can to be the person I want to be.
- No matter what situation arises today, I will handle it with grace and thankfulness.
I always thought positive thinking mantras were a little "granola", but really, they affirm positive thinking and really calm me down.
4. Stop and think at some point every day about how your life is incredible, whether you have the support of your family and friends, a furry sidekick, a great job (or just a job in general), a significant other, and/or great health. All these things are likely something that someone else would kill for. Don't take them for granted.
5. If you find yourself jealous of someone else, remember that Life is Not a Supermarket. Just because someone else has what you want, doesn't mean that you cannot achieve the same thing. There is not a limited amount of happiness to go around. Go find yours! It is important to support and be happy for those around you. That genuine happiness will carry over into your life.
6. If you find that there are certain people in your life that bring on those negative thoughts and feelings, make you feel bad about yourself, or just do not support you or the positive changes you are making (i.e. toxic friends - friends that are likely not bad people but maybe aren't right for you at this point in your life), it might be worth it to sit back and think long and hard about why they are in your life. Is it time to reduce the amount of time you spend with that person? Is the situation bad enough that your "toxic" friend is affecting you so greatly that you should just gently let them go? You get one life, live it to the fullest.
7. Finally, take time for yourself. It takes time to get over the guilt of walking away from everyday duties to take the time to do something for yourself. We have all grown up learning that being selfish (as in, saying, "HEY, this is ME time!") is a bad thing. Taking time for yourself is not selfish, though. Taking this time (for me, I work out or read a book) makes you a happier person which will in turn lead to a positive attitude. I have first hand learned that this time away for myself makes me a better daughter, sister, friend, and employee. I am happier, more productive, and more supportive of those around me. Keep in mind, the dishes, vacuuming, work, and laundry will still be there when you get back and life will not end if it gets put off for a couple hours.
All these things take time and a lot of effort to add into your life, but, trust me, it's worth it. Mental health is just as important, if not more so, than your physical health. Climbing my way out of the worm hole of negative thinking has been one of the most important changes I have ever made in my life (which is saying a lot being that I've lost almost 100 pounds). The work I have done has paid off ten-fold and will likely continue to as I go throughout my life with this commitment to being a positive, happy person, no matter what my situation is.
Great quotes for this topic:
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."
- Herm Albright
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
- Winston Churchill
"Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results."
- Willie Nelson
Do you have a positive thinking tips?
Happy a happy and healthy weekend!
